Sam: Wow, Rex, you've been here every day this week! Rex: Yeah, that probably means I won't come again for a few months. Sam: GD it, Rex! See, why do you make me take the Lord's name in vain?

- Sam and Rex having a conversation about her...inconsistent class attendance

"I was gonna wear tube socks today. If I did, I would take one off, fill it with [round counters] and beat the shit out of you with it. Prison style."

-Sam, who is tired of my injuries

"I'm gonna OG the shit outta that pick up."

- Sam, upon receiving instructions to pick Jess' kids up from school

"Haha hookers are funny. Kinda like baby seals learning how to swim in shallow water. Weird. But fun."

- Sam. Just Sam, to sis Ashley

"This is a little 'Sammy Says Sesh.' "

- Sam, directing mobility, which seemed an awful lot like yoga to me.

Sam: "Rack it up." Me: "Whyyyyy?" Sam: "When you look like you're taking a poop just squatting with a 33lb bar, you're doing mobility. Now, rack it up."

-Sam.  Who was probably right.

Sam's response when I asked for info on gloves for pull ups: